I overheard two ladies talking about a mutual friend while sipping their coffee and everything that they said about their missing girlfriend was awful. My heart sank, and I wanted to walk over to them and ask them why they were talking about her that way, but I didn't. Instead I ordered my coffee, and went on with my day, but that conversation lingered in my ears.
Ladies... When did it become acceptable to tear other women down instead of building them up?
Let me just be the first to say that I'm guilty. I've said less than flattering things about people out of jealousy, frustration, or my own insecurities. Just because I could say those things, does not make it right or mean that I should have said those things.
Ladies... When did it become acceptable to tear other women down instead of building them up?
Let me just be the first to say that I'm guilty. I've said less than flattering things about people out of jealousy, frustration, or my own insecurities. Just because I could say those things, does not make it right or mean that I should have said those things.
What I can't understand is this: when did we as women decided that we needed to be jealous of and threatened by other women? What happened to being eachothers biggest fans and advocates?
In a society where women are treated as property and are glorified for our bodies instead of our brains, if we aren't cheering each other on, who do we think is going to?
We would be hard pressed to find someone outside of our closest girlfriends who would be willing to sing our praises. The sad reality is, we are our own worst enemies. I would rather have one friend that will be honest and loyal, than thirty "friends" who will gossip behind my back and only tell me what I want to hear.
As I sat down to write this post, I thought that maybe I needed to do some research. So i picked up my phone and called several of my girlfriends and asked them for their opinion on this topic. The resounding answer was that they also feel like we are hurting each other more than helping. They also said that they have heard women being nasty toward one another, and not helping their girlfriends to grow in whatever season of life they were in.
Growing up; my mother would tell me " If you can't say something nice Samantha, maybe you shouldn't say anything at all." I didn't think that little pearl of wisdom from my mother meant anything significant until my late twenties. After a pretty significant events in my life, I found myself scrambleing to find girlfriends that were supportive, and would give me the advice that I was desperatly in need of. What i found instead, were women who were willing to give me the obligatory pat on the back and then they were not to be seen after that.
What transpired after changed my life. I can now say that the women I surround myself with are faithful, honest, loving, and genuine women. Each one of them has a past as nasty as the next, but the most important part, is that each of these women value their relationship enough, that none of them would be willing to say anything negative to another woman about another woman.
Ladies, there is a difference between gossiping and helping your sister to better herself. I encourage each lady that reads this post, to gather her girlfriends together, and lovingly address our habit of talking about eachother to one another in less than favorable words.
As women living in a mans world, we owe it to ourselves and eachother to have nothing but kindness and love spoken about eachother. Be kind to eachother , love your girlfriends, and pray for them!
Until next time,
As I sat down to write this post, I thought that maybe I needed to do some research. So i picked up my phone and called several of my girlfriends and asked them for their opinion on this topic. The resounding answer was that they also feel like we are hurting each other more than helping. They also said that they have heard women being nasty toward one another, and not helping their girlfriends to grow in whatever season of life they were in.
Growing up; my mother would tell me " If you can't say something nice Samantha, maybe you shouldn't say anything at all." I didn't think that little pearl of wisdom from my mother meant anything significant until my late twenties. After a pretty significant events in my life, I found myself scrambleing to find girlfriends that were supportive, and would give me the advice that I was desperatly in need of. What i found instead, were women who were willing to give me the obligatory pat on the back and then they were not to be seen after that.
What transpired after changed my life. I can now say that the women I surround myself with are faithful, honest, loving, and genuine women. Each one of them has a past as nasty as the next, but the most important part, is that each of these women value their relationship enough, that none of them would be willing to say anything negative to another woman about another woman.
Ladies, there is a difference between gossiping and helping your sister to better herself. I encourage each lady that reads this post, to gather her girlfriends together, and lovingly address our habit of talking about eachother to one another in less than favorable words.
As women living in a mans world, we owe it to ourselves and eachother to have nothing but kindness and love spoken about eachother. Be kind to eachother , love your girlfriends, and pray for them!
Until next time,
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